Graces Mosquito Bite

Gracey got bit by a mosquito. Poor thing, as you can see her whole eye was swollen. She got up Sunday morning, and said, "Mommy, take it off!" Yesterday it looked worse then Sunday, but did get better as the day went on. I am hoping today its all gone. She's tuffed it out well, and hasn't complain at all. My brave girl!! I will post again later to update.

Later....

Its much better then it was. Its still a bit red, and a bit puffy, and she has a red spot just above her eye brow where the actaul bit is. But she can open it now and I'm sure, see out of it!! LOL

Happy Mothers Day

There was once a time I said I was never having children. Yes, believe it or not, I said that. But I was really afraid that no one would love me enough to want to have a family with me. As I grew into adulthood I realized with careful selecting, I could find someone. I met Goran, and there was just something about him. After a few months of marriage, I thought it would be nice to have a baby. At this point I was willing to admit that I wanted children, and so badly in fact I was fearful maybe it couldn't happen for us. There are those people who try for years, and never have children. I was so afraid I would be one of them. I wasn't. No fancy tricks, or doctors visits for us. With in a few months, Angelina was on the way. I had some trouble with spotting, nothing major, but enough for a first timer like me to be very worried. And then, on November 26th, 2003, I became a mom. Angelina made me a mom. There is something about motherhood that changed me forever. I held the life from inside me, in my arms. 2 years later I experienced birth in a whole new light. I labored at home, surrounded by people how supported me, encouraged me, and I pushed my Gracey into this world. 2 years later I did again. Bryan came into our family, at home, surrounded with people who encouraged me, and loved him.
So now, I go out with them and people say, "Oh wow, are they all yours?" I always smile. "Yes, they're all mine," I reply back. They are my children. They have made me the mom I am. I love them so much. I have guilt about things I wish I had done differently for them. But each day for us is a new day. I fresh day with no mistakes. I try again, every day, because I want the best for them. I want them to grow up, kind, loving, intelligent people. I want them to respect their elders, and love each other. I want them to look back on their childhood with fond memories. I want them to know without a doubt that I loved them from the moment they were conceived inside me. I love them for the individual they are. I tell them every day. I hug them, and kiss them goodnight, and whisper it in their ears. But its more then the words.
My mom has taught me that. She has loved me. Through all the grief I gave her, for all the times I pushed her away, she continues to loves me. She taught me love is more then words, it is actions. Getting up everyday, making sure the children are fed, and dressed. Sometimes going without so they get what they need.
So I want to say thank you to my mom. For being my mom, and loving when I didn't want you to. For showing me what it is to be a mom, and how to put your kids first. For showing me you win over more bees with honey then vinegar:) Happy Mothers Day Mom.
Goran, thank you for making this beautiful family with me. Our 2 beautiful girls, and hansom son. I wouldn't want to do it with anyone else.
Angelina, Grace and Bryan, thank you for making me a mom. Thank you for pushing me to far, and forgiving me when I push you to far. Thank you for wrapping your arms around me and whispering "I love you Mommy," in my ear. Thank you for starting every day fresh, with smiles on your faces. Thank you for showing me the love that only you 3 ever could. You are my passion, and inspiration for life. I will do all in my power to protect you, and keep you safe. Every day of my life, I will love you 3 like it's the last.

So to all the moms out there, HAPPY MOTHERS DAY. I wish you the best mothers day of all!

I'm Sitting!!

Me, sitting in my high chair

Me, sitting and being cute

Me, watching TV.

Me, smiling at Mommy

Hi All

Usually my mom does all the gabbing, but this time its my turn! Take a look at the pics. I've learned how to sit!! Ok, so in the high chair she ties me in, but that is only so I don't slide out. And I have a pillow behind me, but that is only so I don't fall over and klunk my head! But I'm doing really well. At a friends house I was sitting all on my own today, for about 5 minutes. But then I got tired, and I cried for Mommy to pick me up. As you can see in the pics, I have some teething pain. I am chewing on anything I can get in my mouth. (I even tried taking a chomp on my moms nipple, but she didn't like that to much.)
I am 5 months tomorrow. I still sleep with my mom and dad, and eat during the night when I'm hungry. I'm not interested in food yet. I am sitting at the table during supper, and beginning to watch what everyone else is doing. I like to be part of the crowd. I like to sit in my big sisters lap at 10:00 am and watch Mickey Mouse with all the daycare friends. Angelina luvs to carry me around. This is something new, but not to far, because I'm a bit heavy for her. Grace tried to hold me to, but I didn't like that much as I ended up klunking my head. But I luv to watch her play, and we luv to nurse together!!
We are getting over some nasty colds. Mom has been to the doctors 5 time in the past month, but hopefully has something that will help now.
Well that it for me. I'm very tired, and need a nap! Catch ya later!!

3 down, 1 to go

Here is the big boy, jolly jumping!!

So, Bryan is on the mend and feeling better. Yeah!! I'm still dealing with a bad sinuse infections and repeated visits to the doctor is doing little for me. On top of that I have a ear infection now too. I am now on a nasal spray, taking a 3rd round of antibiotics, and have a "Neti Pot". This is a tea pot shaped thing, which I put saline solution in. I put it to one nostril, lean forward and pour it into my nose. After a few seconds just when I think I can't take it, swoosh, it flows out the other side. Its an odd, water up the nose feeling. The pressure in my sinuses is better today, but my ear sure does hurt! But hopefully that gets better soon.

To finish off, here is a picture of my girls with their 'piggy tails'. Smiles on their faces, cute as buttons!!

A bit of a Ruff Week

Well, I tell ya, this little guy's had his ups and down this week. Monday was lovely. Happy smiley guy again. Yeah! Tuesday was a bad one. Poor fellow woke up with a ragging diaper rash. What the heck?? Not a good day. More screamy fussy baby. Nothing was working on the rash. Then my co-worker suggested maybe a yeast from his antibiotics. That's makes sense. I put some good old Conenstin on it at bed time, and yeah, happy fellow in the morning. But by this time those antibiotics are reeking havoc in his digestive track. He's pooping 3-4 times a day, and very grumpy about it each time. Oh boy. I'm sure his tummy is crampy, and sore. Poor guy. I called telehealth, and they said there really isn't much you can do at his age. I started taking a pro-biotic again, so he's getting that through the breast milk, and I think his body is adjusting. He seems better today. We went to my local La Leche League meeting this morning and he was quit happy, flashing smiles around, and playing well.

Here's to hoping it gets better as the weekend goes on!

Here's the little man in a milk-drunken sleep!!

Poor Bryan

Saturday night Bryan was up crying, no, screaming for 2 hours. By Sunday morning I was 2 things. I was very tired and cranky, but I was also absolutely positive something was wrong with my baby. So back to the walk in clinic I went, again. (I had gone in again on Friday after going Tuesday.) The nurse came in and asked me what was wrong, and I started. "He cries alot!! He cried for 2 hours in middle of the night. He constantly has a low grade fever. I know babies, I have 2 girls, I know this isn't normal. He is miserable. I know something is wrong." The doctor confirmed that he had an ear infection, and likely some kind of nasal passage infection as well. I almost cried. I felt so bad. He's has a cold since March 31st. (I wrote it then in the blog.) He's been fighting this for quit awhile. He's been trying to tell me for quite awhile. Last week was awful. He was hungry and wanted to nurse, but every time he tried it would hurt his ear and he would come off after a few sucks and cry and cry. Oh I felt/feel so guilty!! I should have known. I should have been more insistent!!
But, on the happy side, he is happy today. He is really smiling, and wakes up happy. He has needed the soother 1/2 as much as last week, and he is happy to nurse again!! While he is nursing, he looks at me with thankful, happy eyes. I feel better. When he is sad, I can fix it again!!

Getting Better

We've all been sick. Angelina and I had to be on medication. Angelina bounced back the same day the meds started. It was amazing and wonderful to see her feeling better so quickly. It was within hours of starting the meds. She turned the TV off herself, and started interacting with the world around her. She was the happy, trouble causing 4 year old we know. At the same time I was put on meds. I started to feel better, and Grace and Bryan got sick. 10 days later, still on meds, I came down with a fever again, the chills, and a tummy ace. I wanted to bring in Grace and Bryan, and thought I would have the doctor check me over, just in case. Grace and Bryan he said was viral, and didn't want to give them any thing. After looking me over, he tells me I am not over the original bacterial infection I had 10 days ago. What the other doctor had put me on was not strong enough. Well, that explained why I still felt so crummy! So he put me on some strong super drug, and a nasal spray. (I luv nasal sprays!!) Well 48 hours later I woke up feeling GOOD. "Wow. This is what healthy feels like." I thought to myself. Grace and Bryan's fever broke, and we all had a good sleep last night. Bryan is smiling again. They are both a bit cranky, but its coming. They're noses are slowly clearing up, and they are staying awake longer and smiling more. So we are getting better.
And spring has sprung! Angelina is finally on her 2 wheeler...after 2 summers of coaxing, and Grace is busy finding and watching bugs. Both girls are watch the tulips come up, and loving being able to grab a coat and play in the backyard. Bryan is soaking up the rays, and watching his sisters from the carrier or stroller. And me? I'm just happy to have my healthy children back. To see them run down the sidewalk laughing and giggling. To wake up and see the sun coming in the window. To smell the flowers, and the dirt. To smell the BBQ Goran is frying! Feel the sunshine, and the wind. I didn't realize how sick I was. I wasn't happy, I just didn't realize that was because I was so sick.
But what can I say now. Life is good. I couldn't ask for more.