Tuesday, March 31, 2015


I'm so glad I saw the sunrise this morning! I have never seen such vibrant purple and pink in the sky. 

Monday, March 23, 2015


The wee ones painted the beautiful bird houses.

Bryan's been doing math, spelling, reading!

Mommy (with Pakas help) made a beautiful new table, and remodeled the kitchen. 

We've been busy!


The hardest realizations in life don't come to u soft and slow. They come rushing at u, and hit u like a ton of bricks. Knocking the wind of out u, rocking ur world, leaving u hurt, bruised, and shocked. Then u need to decide what to do, while u pick up the pieces.  

Friday, March 13, 2015

{this moment}

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{this moment} ~ A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments for all to find and see.
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inspired by SouleMama

Fixing Footies

My Grace mentioned to me more then once that her toes were getting stuck in the holes of her footies while she slept and she woke up with hurting toes. I would nod, and we'd carry on with the day. A few days later she'd gently remind me.

Fast forward a few weeks, she gently puts them in my hands and says in her very big grown up voice "I'll give you over March break to get these fixed. Is that ok?"

I offered to do them that night!

After looking them over I realized they where worse then I thought. The material was shredded! No quick hand sew here.

I took pictures and text my mom. "What do I do? I want to fix the for her, she luvs them."

In all the upheaval of our lives right now, this was something I could do right.

She suggested zig zag but we decided they were beyond that. She suggested replacing the foot pad.

I picked soft green fabric I had and set to work.

She was so happy she didn't want to put them in the wash this morning.

Sunday, March 8, 2015

The Value of Time

I've sat and watched this weekend. Watched them grow. Samuel played with his cousin Kurtis. They got apples out of the fridge and sat in the windowsill munching away.  Angelina, like a preteen, hung out with a friend. Bryan planned to play hockey with Zach and Daddy, and counted down days and hours till the time arrived, helped to pack up the luggage and happily headed to the rink with his 'team mates'. Grace and her cousin, laughed and giggled in their play, and helped clean up the kitchen after supper. Klara talked up a storm, shared stories, and had a lot of those "Remember that time.." moments as she reflected on life.

Today at church Samuel sat on my friends lap, and they shared some pie together. I stood mesmerized, as he tried to feed her and missed and she laughed, the kind of genuine laugh that makes your whole body shake. This set Samuel giggling, the kind of giggle that made his eyes squint and his body wiggling with joy. In that moment all I could think of was how short time was. How I take it for granted, and think I have all the time in the world, but these baby's of mine are growing up right before my eyes, and fast.

Grace carted cousin Kurtis around, on her hip, helping him eat, changing his diaper, and helping bath and dress him this morning. She is a little mommy. Growing into this role of helping and filling the gaps.

After church its s scramble for coats. Helping stuff arms in arm holes, zip zippers, and find the right hats and mitts. Someone always waits, while I help someone else, or someone will help the waiting one. Today as I finished with my own and turned to help a wee one, I saw two elderly ladies helping Samuel. They joked and teased each other about not doing it right, about Samuel not putting his arm in right, and finally both laughed when his fingers came through the sleeve. They both agree to leave the zipper to me!

I was struck again by this realization how short it is. This time. These days. How quick they grow, how much fun they are, and how much I'll miss this when they are grown.

Kurtis had his 1st sleep over. 

I'm honestly racked with guilt for the wasted time. Time trying to change things I can't. So busy trying to change things, I've neglected the things that mean the most. 

I feel a different kind of change. The stretching and nudging of the conscience telling me its time to move forward. Leave the past behind, hang on to the promise of peace, and joy, and the simple life of being. The wheels continue to be in motion, as spring brings the promise of new hope.  

Wednesday, March 4, 2015

In the Thick of It - Raising 5

The day begins at 5:00 am. a swirl of baby tucking in with daddy, shower, oatmeal, waking 4, and off to get the bus. By 7:00 am, me and 5 are loading into the bus beginning the day. I'm so thankful its light outside now.

By 9:00 we are home. Guess what? Everyone is hungry! Snack and off to enjoy the snow. Mommy tidies and cleans and put cloths away, prepares lesson and calls wee ones in to get ready for gym.

11:00 am finds the house quiet as daddy piled them into the van leaving me and Sam home. I prep lunch, and lay down with Sam. My alarm goes off just before 12:00 pm so I can finish lunch and greet the others as they come in from gym.

1:00 pm. lunch is cleaned up and put away. Hugs and kisses as daddy heads off to work. Quietly kids set down to lessons, books, and coloring before we head off in the bus.

3:00 pm brings a yellow bus and laughter and joking of many children. Sam sleeps in his car seat, (nap time) and momma is lost in the focus of the bus...

5:00 pm we are unloading from the bus at home. Supper, showers for little ones, and pjs as we get ready for library story time.

7:15 pm brings us here. Our local library. Stories and songs, and games and books. We've made friends with our librarians after 4+ years, and they greet us happily every week.

Klara has begun refusing pictures. I'm so glad I was able to snag her in a few.

9:00 pm brings me quietly in front of the TV children tucked in and house tidy, waiting to do it all again tomorrow. 

Raising 5, one day at a time. 

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

In Like a Lion.....

Welcome March!

Afternoon bus route greeted us with freezing rain! What a long drive home that was!

But we made it, slow and steady and safely! They had a romp in the giant snow hill, locked up our bus, and headed home for supper, and fire side movie.

My Girl Guides

When I was a girl my church had a program that was very similar to girl guides. Uniforms, badges, once a week meetings, and outings. I remember the accomplishment of earning badges, the fun with friends, and the learning. 

Our church runs a girls guide program so in September Angelina joined Girl Guides. She was a bit nervous and that held her back a bit...and then she went to overnight camp! Suddenly she was talking about badges, and friends, and cookies! She now will spend a whole day with her badge book and current project spread out all over the table. The self motivation, and desire to learn and do well is beautiful to watch. 

amgelina is sewing on her own badges!

all those folded over tape tabs are badges just waiting to be done! 

We had to wait for Grace to turn 9, and then she joined as well. Its taking her time, but she is earning badges on badge nights, talking about the fire hall night, and friends that she is making. She is eager to get her uniform, and guide book working through badges on her own like her big sister. 

As a busy homeschooling bus driving mom of 5, this is so wonderful for us. The girls get to go somewhere new, listen to someone new, meet new people, and interact together in new ways. They are learning about community, caring, safety, kindness, friendships, hard work, and the list goes on and on. I know the wonderful ladies from church who run the girl guides, so this feels like a great place to begin stepping out of our box and getting involved in other community groups and letting go. A tiny bit. Because I volunteer when I can at extra events ;)

New Adventures

In August I was getting restless. Things at home needed a change. I was a bit desperate to see change, and feel better physically and emotionally.

I have a very good friend who's a bus driver.....and now our days begin and end with this.

It fills our days. The wee ones have made a handful of friends, that they look forward to seeing every single day. It is mutual, as the students look and ask for my kids if they aren't on. 

Its given me money. Money for the kids, money for special treats, money for house projects, money for gifts, and money for trips to Great Wolf Lodge! We all enjoy the benefits. 

It gives me a sense of self in a strange way. I will think about it more, as I'm not sure how to explain it, but its part of me right now. I luv the sunrise, I luv greeting the students, I luv meeting other drivers, and the office staff, I luv the drive. Thinking, focusing on the road, the cars the lights....getting lost in it. Simply lost. Removing all else from my mind, and driving this big yellow bus. Greeting kids with a smile, and wishing them a good night as the end of the day.

This gives me daily purpose. Every single day, people depend on me. 

I read a quote about ambition. I forget the exact quote, but it was along the lines that the cure to depression is ambition. I wish I could find it, I've looked everywhere with little luck. But the ambition to do more, help people, fill my already busy days with more, has given back to me, in ways I never dreamed. 

Sunday, March 1, 2015

I'm Baaack!

I'm back! Lots of catching up to do, but 1st a day in the life....

Growing boy 2

Mount Laundry

My growing boy 1

My growing girl 3


Keep posted :)