Witness

I witnessed one of the things I fear for my children. How do I stop it? How do I give them the tools to stand up and say "Stop it!"? My heart bled for poor Grace today.

It was the end of the day. We had walked to the park with some daycare friends and were walking them home. We met a few neighborhood children, and the mom of the children I had, on the way. The mom and I were chatting and the children were running up and down the sidewalk playing. As we were talking I could here chatting coming from the children. They were 2-3 houses down the street. I had to stop talking to hear them. "Gracie is a baby, Gracie is a baby..."My heart sunk. Gracie was standing there trying to hide behind a tree, 3 other children standing in front of her (Angelina was amongst them) chanting these nasty works at my Gracie. Gracie who is stuck in the middle. Gracie, who doesn't know if she is a big girl or a baby, but is trying so hard to find her place. Another mother heard and came flying out of a nearby house to put a stop to it, and I raised my voice in Gracie's defense. The situation diffused quickly. Within a few minutes Gracie came to me and climbed into Bryan's abandoned stroller. I tried to speak to Grace about it but she wouldn't look at me. I stopped her and said "Grace, look at mommy." She obliged. "Are you Ok Grace?" I asked her. "Mommy, I like your pretty hair," she said...trying to change the subject like she has a tendency to do when something is bothering her. She was looking me straight in the eyes, and I could see her hurt there. I couldn't get a clear answer out of her, and gave up. Then, to add to it all, (and this really bothers me) the mom I had been talking to goes as far as to defend the children picking on Grace! How dare you! If it had been your daughter they were picking on it would have been a different story!

So about a week ago I posted a blog about my fears for my children, and steps forward I am taking to try to get past it. But this is just another example. I don't want my children, any of them, ridiculed or picked on. I want them to have the tools to stand up for themselves and others when need be. But how do I do that? I teach them the words to use so often, "Stop it!' "I don't like it"(remembering that they are still small), but for some reason Grace stood there, seemingly defenseless.

Tonight I go to bed with a heavy heart, and my fear for my childrens physical and emotional safety continues to be a great a concern.

"Gracie, I'm sorry I could not stop your hurt today. Mommy is sorry I haven't given you the tools to stand up for yourself. I hope and pray I can change this, and together we can grow and learn, and prepare you for whatever tomorrow brings. I luv you Sweetheart."