{this moment}

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments for all to find and see.

 Inspired by SouleMama. 

My Boys

This is going to be a bit rambley.

As I go through my mothering journey I'm learning things. As my children grow I'm learning things about them.  I'm learning that girls are sweet and kind, and its easy for me to feel connected to them, because my girls tent to be quiet snugglers who read books and carry babies around. Just like their momma. Easy Peasy.

These, boys, they are loud, and full of energy, running and not often following mommas advice. Sweet Bryan would often leave the books untouched for a game of running through the house, or following Daddy around while he fixes thing, chops wood or builds something.

While I was pregnant with my Sam, I wanted a girl. They are easier, and I understand them. So I was having a girl.

As the girls have grown and mostly through my pregnancy I came to realize that girls are dramatic. Whether they are 2, or 10, there is a lot more crying, and hurt feelings and misunderstandings. And I noticed with Bryan, he tells it like it is. So as they have grown, I'm finding that boys tend to be 'easier'. He will sit and read books, about snakes, and dinosaurs. He does have a thing for babies, but real ones that are his siblings.

Because Bryan was an uncomfortable baby, he was an unhappy baby. And in my head all that went together with his sex. This made it hard for me to connect to him. It might sound awful, but a sleep deprived exhausted overwhelmed mother puts crazy things together in her head.

So there was no way I was having another boy.

And then there was Sam. I want to be clear, I wasn't disappointed in any way. I was ecstatic! I had a boy, filling my arms, snuggling against me, happy as could be.

Because of Bryan's discomfort as a baby, and unhappiness, I try harder to meet Sams needs and understand whats wrong so he can be happy. I've made and extra effort spending extra time, hugging, holding, and carrying him to connect with him. In this I've found my bond with Bryan has strengthened as well!

I though I wanted a girl, and I thought I  had it all figured out. But as my wee ones grow, I'm learning that I'm learning!

Sam is good for me. Sam is good for Bryan, who is so thrilled to have a brother. Sam is good for me and Bryan as he has taught me and strengthened our bond. I see Sam smile at his sisters, and melt his dads heart. Sam is what we needed.

I thought I knew what I wanted. What we needed, but as I told the wee ones my whole pregnancy, we don't get to pick, God, does. And He knew exactly what we needed.

MIA

Yep that's me. MIA. Business in a way I find overwhelming, and craziness I find overwhelming.

But here we are, with a quick update of our most current project underway. I had to post a few pics, as they grow, and change so fast.

Springs been slow in arriving, but it is finally (dare I say it?) here. I think. Warm sunshine, Klarars 3rd birthday approaching, and line dried sheets. All signs of spring!


Here is my plot of land...for my garden this year. Hubby working hard.

Baby sunning his sweet bare feet while garden is being made.

Ready....

......set.....

GO!

Sweet pea, looking like a sweet gardener. She does a good job getting dirty. (I have to let my clean thing go and let them get dirty....)

Mother Hen with SamSam. Man, he's growing fast!

After a good fence, 4 yards of topsoil, and time and energy, Goran says, "Wait and see, it will work this year!" So here we go, waiting. Ive posted pics of baby veggies growing, and my hopes have been crushed twice as I watched my hard work wilt away. Im hoping with continuing hard work again, it will produce and I can post pics of veggies fully matured, ready for my family to enjoy.

Here's hoping!!

Easter Outfits and Rubber Boots

Happy Easter from our house to yours!

Its been a crazy six weeks since sweet boy Sam joined us. I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed. It seems a good day is one when everyone has gotten dressed, eaten 3 meals, gotten outside, and been put to bed before 9:00pm. In there is ballet, gymnastics, trips to a breastfeeding clinic in Toronto, sleep overs at Nana's, library, and other such fun. Its not bad, just busy.

I have felt distracted. Sam has a tongue tie, that we are trying to hard to break, but its refusing, causing me pain, and him frequent feeding, (day and night). As this is my passion, and so important to me, we will figure it out, and keep pushing forward.

In the mean time 'they' continue to grow. All 5 of these amazing children of mine.

I'll try to blog again this week, but I'm hanging on, as it promises to be another whirl wind!

Growing

It's happening right before my eyes.

They are growing.

I watch in amazement and wonder. What a blessing a privilege to be part of it all <3 nbsp="" p="">

Hanging with each other,

my outfit score! I had seen it before Sam was born, but it was a bit pricey. Last night grocery shopping I came across the last one, dicounted fore 1/4 of the original price!

and with friends.

I stand back a bit sometimes. I'm just thankful to be here, to know who they are. My momma heart is full and pounding, and cought in the amazement of it all.

"I knew he was a boy," said Bryan. "Because I wanted a brother."

Truly we have moments throughout the day. When Sam is hungry at breakfast and so is everyone else. When Sam cries the whole way to the library. When Bryan is terrorizing Klara and I'm in the middle of making a late breakfast (because I was feeding Baby for the 3rd time). When Grace wants to hold Sam and I finally just got him to sleep, and now she is crushed and crying....or when Angelina is yelling at me about school work or putting her clothes away. And sometimes, when Goran and are bickering about something really dumb, and Sam is crying, kids are running bonkers, someone is crying, and no one is listening.

We have our moments.

can u see my thing with booties? my only regret is i didn't realize befor number 5 how cute they are!

But I chose to step back from them, and hang onto those tiny moments throughout the day that take my breath away.

Hoping you're enjoying ur weekend! 

When he was just days old, sleeping on my chest one morning, sighing and grunting as new babies do,  Grace says "Mom, I luv the baby noises he makes." Awwww!!

The Last Day

It was an amazing week. The resting, snuggling, snoozing, watching, and enjoying. I enjoyed all of it. Feeling, living, breathing, sleepless nights, and poopy diapers. The exhausted drama of the big ones, the helping hands that never stopped, the patience of my luving husband, and tiny cries during the night of sweet Sam.

We decided on a movie/pizza night for the last day. Ordered pizza, ordered movie, some extra chocolate, and all of us while tucked around the TV.

all 5 of my kids and hubby

Goran said, "This is the best vacation I've ever had," as we cleaned up the playroom, "No rushing, no hurrying, just us here being together."

"And we had a baby!" I smiled.

He smiled and agreed.

Our party was a celebration. The 1st week being the success I had dreamed for months, for the gift of our baby Sam, and for where our family is now with 5. Oh we had a moments during the movie, but mostly we snuggled more, watched, ate, and enjoyed. 

Luved this time with just us! 

{these moments}

{these moments} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments for all to find and see.

10lb 3oz today