My Project

When I was pregnant I had formed this project in my mind. I was going to redo Bryan's room for him to share with Klara. He was excited about sharing his space, and having Klara in his room. And then when I miscarried he was confused. He was still talking about the baby and we would have to remind him our baby died. He was still talking about sharing his space too.

"But when Klara comes to my room...."he'd begin and then tell us a story.

So that is where I threw my energy. I had all this energy, and sadness, and I had to do something with it. I didn't want to be sad, always thinking about my miscarriage, and have fits of crying over our loss. Yes, its there, always, but my kids and husband need more from me.

So I started planning, and saving, and dreaming. Planning out the space, colors to accent, curtains to hang, matching bedspreads that were not to gender specific....saving money to buy all this stuff.....and dreaming how great it would look.

I planned a big trip to IKEA, and although my shopping buddy had to board a plane to see an ailing aunt the day before, I found another, a new sitter, and off I went. I have now spent the last 2 days, assembling, stuffing, drilling and hanging. But I luv it! (They do too!)

It was good for me. To do something with my hands. To bring what I saw in my mind a reality. Klara has gone to bed last night and tonight in her new bed. I have to admit, I wasn't ready for that. I like having her beside me at night. There is a comfort in the night to putting my hand on her back and feeling her breath. To her waking in the early morning, tugging at my shirt and the sweet sound of satisfaction as her breath becomes more easied again, while she nurses back to sleep. I was thankful at 3:00am when she woke calling me and was happy to come back to my bed!

she has begun to make herself at home :)

she luvs turning the light off/on....she just can't figure out the on part!

i turned Bryans off last night when i went to bed, and he woke and turned it back on at some point :)

red book sling! to match duvet

 

blue for Bryan, again to match (yes the fabrics match!)
 
ideas and patterns for the book slings borrowed from:
http://pennycarnival.typepad.com/penny_carnival/2009/02/tutorial-hanging-book-displ ay.html

so cute, so happy

so proud and watching big brother for what to do next

So its done. I'm happy to say the kids gather in there to sit on the fluffy duvets and read.  All 4 of them. Bryan was happy to announce at bedtime that he was going to sleep and show Klara how to be big!

I have much more to write. I am mulling over how to say it, how much to say, and how much to keep to myself. But in the mean time I have more work to do...a front hall to strip the wall paper from, paint, and add the finishing touches!

What have u been up to lately?