July 29, 2019

The Earth has been washed with a fresh rain and I can smell that rain smell coming through the windows. The fans hum, and the air in the house is still humid, but I know through the night the fresh air will creep in and it will feel cool and refreshing by morning.

Its been a long time since I've been to this space. So much has happened, good and bad, and its always a wonder where to start.

We added a beautiful girl to our brood. What a happy, sweet unexpected surprise she was. I will forever be grateful to Goran for suggesting "maybe one more?"

Ariana Hope December 10, 2018

Our family is growing, healthy, and busy. Life continues with daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly routines that are comforting, predictable, and reassuring as we are met with uncertainties that life just brings.

I am honored to have these people as my family. To be able to say all of them are my children.

The house is quiet. Bedtime routine completed and most of these little people are dreaming of all the fun we'll have tomorrow. I am off to bed as well, but I promise to write more. Hopefully tomorrow.

Camping With 6!

Getting out the door took hours longer then expected. Everyone was crappy and frustrated...but we finally did it. 

Walking back from the pool where he went under 2xs and after I picked him up he went right back to running and jumping in! 

So I bombed the smores...only had tiny marshmallows! But, I brought ice cream cones and foil and we wrapped them up and threw them in the fire. 

"This is awsome Mom!" 

"Mom, wouldn't it have been awesome if u had twin girls?" 

"Sure would have!" 

"If she'd been born the same time as me?" 

"And you would have a twin sister!" 

"And we could share clothes!" 

Her kind and generous heart ♥️ 

"Hey buddy come here for a selfie!" Toad in his hands, he looks up and smiles. 

Summer Days and Baby Days

It's flying by. Somehow we are 6 weeks post partum tomorrow. We have filed the sun shinny days of summer with swimming lessons, soccer nights, visits with cousins/friends, ice cream treats, stacking wood, and late night swims.

My garden is meager and struggling...I've been slightly distracted, but it has yielded tomatoes, and zucchini. Kale is ripe and ready for picking, and I'm trusting that the flourishing potatoes plants are growing beautiful huge round potatoes for use to eat. If someone would just get to those weeds....

The pools turned green more then once...so many times in fact I have found WATER BUGS making themselves at home. It's been clean for almost a week now, we can see the icecubey pattern on the bottom and no more water bugs skimming and dividing. Only 4 more weeks, and it'll be time to close it up. I look forward to one less thing, but dread the ending of summer. No more flip flops, sun drenched kids, and ice cream smudged mouths. 

I luv these days. Relaxed summer days, watching the kids play, reading Charlottes Web aloud, and cuddling sweet growing Caleb. It's a sobering thought that these baby days are my last baby days. I cuddle him and hold him as long as time allows. I wrap him, and walk him, and nurse him, and push away any complaint that tries to surface. It's not easy, but I made a decision to focus on the positive. The new baby smiles, each new sound Sam makes, the way Klara has found a luv for soccer, the way Bryan is reading with renewed determination, the way Grace changes a diaper with ease, and Angelina bakes cookies, makes lunches, and throws shepherds pie in the oven. I'm an blessed. And in the hard moments, those moments I could almost cry, or pull my hair out, or shout at someone who doesn't deserve it, I stop, breath, picture the good moments, smiles, sounds, soccer, arms holding the baby, curly hummid hair, and long swimming legs, and I'm reminded of why I'm here. Why I luv it. I hug the kids, say my sorries, let them see me sad, so they see I'm genuine and we move forward. We smile, tell jokes, I lift that baby my arms, wrap an arm around Sam, and soak it in.

More about camping, garden pics, and 6 weeks pics over the weekend.

Klara's Ballet Pics

Klaras recital was amazing as usual. She tried her hardest, and did that thing where she sticks her tongue out the side of her mouth because she is concentrating so hard!

And she was as cute as could be!

I was asked several times how much longer I had to go before I was due. Funny how I didn't know then that Caleb was coming before I thought!

Summer Solstice with 6

I wasn't up for much. My leg was still numb on and off, and if I sat for too my bottom would go numb and I couldn't get up. The 6th one is harder to recover from then the 1st one!

But we did head out to a local provincial park for a swim, and enjoy this long late night!

running in! 

trying to find stones to skip

my tiny squish, so sweet and peaceful
my number 6
with stork bite scattered across his brown
he has made my heart grow bigger then i ever imagined 

I've tried hard right from the beginning to keep up with kids. Given them things to do, and be involved, even if I move slower, or have to wait to settle Caleb, I know they need me too.

Bryan was telling Klara "You'll see, Moms tummy will get smaller and smaller, and she feel better and better, and she'll start doing everything like before, and we'll have our mom back."

Oh be still my heart.

Celebrating

The Saturday after Caleb was born my mom came for the day to help. I napped, she played with the kids, did laundry, prepped supper, made salad, you name it. I rested, held my baby, and watched my bid kids play. 

And before they left we ate together. It makes my heart so happy when we sit celebrating my new baby,  around the table my dad and I envisioned together, and made together <3 div="">

Day 1 of Photos-A-Day Caleb

1st one to hold him!

it was 5pm the 1st day before he wanted to hold him

baby whisperer

snuggley boys

'can i hold him' She asks over and over

The first days are magical. Cuddles, slow days, dreamy gazing, and deeply breathing that squish in. Not just me, but all of us. The house was a constant stream of help I will always be grateful for. Help with the big kids, laundry, meals, and tidying, The naps, with Caleb snuggled up against me, and Sam behind me, felt cozy and familiar. Treasures I hold onto in my memory.

Baby cries, so its time to end this post and head to bed.

Goodnight!