There is a familiar theme to my blog these days. Well I guess its in my mind, so that is what comes out. Time goes by too fast!!
My baby, the first one I pushed into this world, is 7 years old!!!! How did that happen?
My 2nd child, my first homebirthed baby, is 5 years old!!! What the heck?
My 3rd child, my first son is 3 years old!!! Where did the last 3 years go?
My 4th child, my 3rd girl, truly my baby right now turns 9 months old today!! Honest, I don't know where the last 9 months have gone. She has gone from a new born to a scotching, babbling, screeching baby in what seems like over night.
I beg God to slow down time. To let me enjoy them just a bit more. I try to remember, in the times of complete frustration, its going to pass. It will be over in seconds.
Time keeps marching on.
Klara, my sweet tiny girl is 9 months today. All the frustrations and anxiety surrounding her birth, her position in my womb, forgotten - almost :) The first days, of snoozing and holding, and nursing, ingrained in my memory. My baby carried in the sling constantly beside my heart. Summer of long walks, reading "Little House On The Parie" to the 'big kids' and nursing my infant in the shade. Camping, and beach days, and evenings spent picking fresh veggies from the garden. All with Klara slung tight against me. And then the leaves were turning colors and I was packing up the house, and labeling boxes. Picking out light fixtures and paint for the new house. Still my baby was against me. Then we were moved and preparing for Christmas. The floor was finished over a few weeks, and the tree was up, beautifully decorated with help from the 3 'big kids'. Still I carried my baby often throughout the day. Quick shopping trips, and walks in the snow. Early morning vacuum, and evening dishes, she loved being close. Suddenly I was taking down the tree and purging the house, and January was fading, Valentines Day approaching but wait.....whats happening....my baby is moving...she complains now when slung or carried...she wants down...
I was sad. And I was happy. I was happy for her. She had figured out something new, and was proud. She was content to play, move around the main floor getting into the garbage, attacking the broom, but never reaching the cats in time. Her confidence is building and she is learning and growing. But it seemed in her growing I had lost something. My sling baby wanted down. That went on for over a week.
But this past week, she seemed trouble. She didn't want to nurse, she didn't want to play, she wanted up, but didn't want to sit......I threw her in the ergo for dishes one night. She was quiet. She snuggled against my back. She was asleep before I was done. A few more times this week, she has been the same. Unsettled. Anxious. A walk around the block in the sling, or sink full of dishes in the ergo settles her again. Sometimes she relaxes against me, listens to my heart and voice, and drifts to sleep. Sometimes she plays peek-a-boo with Daddy. Sometimes she chatters to the big kids as they pass her toys and tickle her toes. And sometimes she tries to stretch around me to see what I am doing.
I'll take it! This fleeting piece of her babyhood. I will take what I can get. As I've said so many times before, time is flying by. All too soon the sling and ergo will hang on hooks covered in dust....and a little girls laughter will float threw the window as she chases her sibling around the yard.
