7 days to Go - Kicks, List of ?'s For Midwife

Definitely getting kicks on the left side up in my ribs. Hope this is means a head down baby...feeling pressure (from a head?) 'down there' and none of the weird pressure from one part sitting on each hip I had on Friday and Saturday. I'm hopeful today this will be another great home birth for me.

I wrote that this am. As the day has turned into evening I 'feel' kicks down there again and I think a big knobby head up near my belly button. Seems this baby still has lots of room to move!!

Here is my list I'm working on for the midwife.

1. What would you do?? if you were me, with my history, (G & B) and really believed in the end that my body and baby will do it, what would you do?
2. If I go with a transversion, can I go home without them breaking my water?
3. If not, how long can I wait for a transversion?
4. I don't want an epidural, is that a possibility? Because I want to go home and birth my baby.
5. Can/Will MW and hubby come with me for a transversion? (I won't go without those support people)
6. 'M' if we end up in hospital -NOT 'B'!!! One hospital is the one in the town I live in, the other is one town over. It might take a few extra minutes to get to 'M' - but 'B', they are knife happy, and the nurses are difficult, and NO ONE, I mean NO ONE I know who has gone in there has come out happy.
7. What drugs are my choice if I end up in c-section?

I want to make sure that my MW knows how I feel. I don't feel any support from them for my decision or 'choices' at this point. I feel like I am fighting them for what I know my body can do. I feel they should be empowering me, and supporting me, and continue to do that along the way. At this point, because I have had to fight them, I don't have much trust or faith in them. They seem to doubt their ability to help or even support me, and this is causing me to doubt them when it comes down to 'crunch' time. Are they really going to advocate for me if I end up in an ambulance/hospital, or are they going to let the Dr's and nurses take me and wave as they wheel me done the hall.

I think that's it. It might be a really hard discussion, but I think so so important if I am to get through this with them. They need to know how I feel, and be able to be what I need, and they can't do that if they don't know the 'mistake's' I feel they are making when it come to me.

Okay, going to submerse myself in a tub of water, and go to bed. I need to sleep and rest knowing this will be over long before I am ready for it :)

7 Days to Go - Pics Last Night

Belly Shots - So Close!!

I am so close to the end. 'Could be any day now', but I don't feel like that. I have decided for day to leave the worry for tomorrow. I am enjoying the movements - feeling my baby - which ever way he/she is lying right now. Which ever way it turns out to be 'over', when its done its done and I can't get this back.

So here are 2 belly shots - I have some 'risky' ones, but am a bit to shy to put them up :) I'm glad I have them for myself. I will develop them and put them in the baby's album.

In these shots I believe I am about 38 weeks and 6 days. My belly, I think, is bigger then ever before!! I wonder how big the baby is, and whether he/she is as big as the others, bigger or smaller. I can't say it feels different. I wonder ever so much whether I'm carrying a boy or girl.






Its looks like a misshapen beach ball in there!!! Can't wait to hold this baby :)

*sigh*

Soon.

I have a million ?'s for the midwife tomorrow. I will post them tonight and write them down so I don't forget, and write down her answers tomorrow.

8 Days - Angelina's Questions

I was making lunch for them today and Angelina has some questions for me. She has clearly heard me talking about the baby and how its lying, and what will happen. It was clear as we talked that she understood there was a problem.

"Mommy, how is your baby laying in your tummy?"

"Well on Tuesday when were at the midwives the baby was laying transverse." Pointing at my tummy I showed her what that means. "The baby's head is here and bum is here. Most baby's come out head first, but some come out bum first."

"How did I come out?"

"You came head first. So did Grace and Bryan."

"How will this baby come out?"

"Well, we don't really know. Either head first or bum first. But a transverse baby" - pointing to reminder her what that means - "sideways, can't come out. Those baby's get stuck, and then mommy would have to go to the hospital and have a c-section."

"I know what that is," she said - and actaully avoided eye contact with me - "that's when they cut you and take the baby out."

"Yes, that's right," I told her. "They would cut mommy here," I showered her low on my tummy, "and pull the baby out of my tummy. But we are really hoping that baby goes one way or the other, head or bum, so that doesn't happen. We just have to wait and see."

That seemed to satisfy her.

But it really is that simple, and I don't think there is much we can do at this point but wait. Like I have said over and over again....I will see on Tuesday and talk to the midwife more then. Just waiting really....the hardest part :)

8 Days to - Sunday May 16

I see, looking at the weather, the next pressure system isn't until till next weekend. That is when the baby will come. Sat or Sun....any guesses? I have a week for baby to turn. Or stay breech. Which will it be? Worry, worry, seems like all I do. I'm tired today, and the rest of the crew were all up at 7:00am...but going for a good nap, as noses are running, and grumpies are on. Daddy took the smallest one swimming, and once he's back I will be off to my workshop.

That's it for now as I have a million things to do before I leave. Have a great day, pics tonight!!

9th Day to Go - Bed Time

Off to bed I go shortly. I have given up for tonight trying to feel where the baby's head is, or guessing what the shifting is 'way down low'. I'm tired, I don't know in the end what's going to happen. I believe it will all work out, because this IS what my body has been made to do. 3 times before with great success. I've walked, and done my crazy puke inducing positions and hope, but have a bit of doubt, that its helping somehow.

Busy day tomorrow. A communication workshop. I'm looking forward to, but had hoped 2 weeks ago at Part II I wouldn't be there for Part III because of a baby. But I kinda knew I would be. So, I will make my desserts ready, and off I go once daddy and Bryan get home from swimming. At least its keeping my mind busy and I won't be worrying to much :)

I will have Goran take some pics while I'm still pregnant, and hope to post them in the next few days. I keep thinking I have to do that before it's to late, but the days keep going by before I get a chance. But I put the camera on the table so I won't forget or put if off any longer.

That's it for tonight. Hoping I sleep well.

9 Days to Go - Breech This Am.

My baby remains in a 'unfavorable' position. Breech - as that big head is on the left side of my navel, and kicks are way down low in my pelvis. I will walk more this today, do my upside down lie a few times, and and do the inversion in hope baby flips.

I'm feeling a bit discouraged, but not hopeless. I know there is still lots of time, and I am mulling over a few more ideas in my head. Chiropractor, or maybe a bought of swimming next week. It seems to me the swimming got us in this mess as baby was more buoyant and bobbed head up, so what will it hurt to go swimming...LOL. And I have been going over the whole 'transeversion' by doctor in my head. I know how they 'usually' do it, but I would have my won idea. I would go in, with my husband and my midwife. NO epidural. I understands it makes it easier, but I'm not comfortable not being able to move. I would not want to induced after wards either. My midwife told me after wards they break the water so the baby doesn't turn around again. Makes sense, other then baby will start labor when he/she is ready. I don't want to break my waters and then sit for 24 hours. Oh, and I want to go home after ward. I'm not staying there. No way. I will go home and wait for my labor to start.

Well, I have till Tuesday to get this baby to turn. I will remain hopeful and do my stuff.

10 Days to go - Part II - Baby

Okay, so the big concern is the way my baby is sitting. Well I am quit sure that this morning baby was head up. Big bobble head on the right side by my navel. And a little itty bum resting on my pelvis. Feet and kicks way down inside. So its been a busy day. Cleaning, vacuuming, washing floors, laundry, baking, walking the oldest to and from school, and almost time to get supper ready. Well now at the near end of the day, and my energy, I KNOW beyond a doubt this baby is transverse. I feel a head on one hip (right) and a butt on the other (left). So what am I going to do now? Walk, inversion, and hope like crazy he/she decides to go head down.

http://spinningbabies.com/baby-positions/all-positions/sideways

This website is good, and talks about all kinds of positions that baby's sit in. It also mentions that if you baby has been head down and recently flipped, to give it time, (a few days) as it will likely flip again. Here is for hoping :)

And off for a walk, for some help from gravity!!!